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| My friend the wall |
Yesterday ended in a weird kind of tizzy. I went on a date(apparently) with my friend and he seemed upset the whole time. Which was caused me to be upset but I still had fun by talking to the other people there. So yeah today I tried to offset that little tizzy. I made friends with a wall and told everyone that I appreciate them. Except that wall for insulting my mother. I will come back in 7 years and burn that tree down and forgive that wall. Don't ask. Today I was sitting on my sitting rock and I met someone I haven't seen in a few years and he remembered me? That's so strange I just assume people will forget me when they don't see me for a few years. Even so I have never been good at making friends. I have always been different from everyone. I crave to be like everyone else and I almost always try to be normal. Yet it tends to not happen, I just get scared and act weird. Most of my life I avoided people because it was easier to avoid people than to deal with their scourging and them telling me that I am weird. I remember just avoiding everyone and I felt like no one liked me. Maybe no one ever will, I am just to weird. I mean truly like me, I have only ever had a few friends that take me seriously. I was going to say something but nah... Good night, go gently. Every once in awhile I meet someone who I feel absolutely comfortable with. I don't really even know them well, however as soon as I meet this person I fall in complete like with them. I would do anything to be there friend. That includes talking, which is hard for me. I remember one time it took me several years (the number is more embarrassing) to say hi to someone. I am not exaggerating. Please leave a comment, It's makes me sad. I might have a citizen cane review up soon I don't really know dude.
2 comments:
"I crave to be like everyone else and I almost always try to be normal..." Huh. That's interesting. Not that, but...
I've never given it much thought until now, whether I crave to be like everyone else, or try to be normal. I do try not to slouch, which is apparently my natural posture; I do try to breathe through my nose instead of my mouth; I look people in the eye, I think, I can never remember if I did or not after having a conversation which would probably mean that it's hopefully a habit by this point so it came as second nature without having to focus on it; but why are those things? Is it trying to be normal? Is it trying not to come across as spasticus autisticus? But I've never had trouble getting people to like me; I guess I'm just blessed. I just... I've never even had to try. I haven't tried. Do you think that might be the secret, just to be yourself? It's certainly what all the after-school specials taught (remember those?)... And up till now I've always been confused by that, because, no matter what you do, you're still yourself, and, how else would you act? but now maybe I think that it's all about not having to hide anything, what does it even mean to live a lie I don't even know, is there a difference between manners and morals when both come down to interacting with other people, but if they're the same then wouldn't it be a sin to be awkward, but where does awkwardness come from is it from trying to be someone else, or being too much of yourself, and are those even opposites and
AAARGH I SHOULD BE DOING HOMEWORK AND STUFF RIGHT NOW DRAT YOU ANDREA!!!
I'm sorry Eric :'(
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